You Wanna Pizza Me?

All of the big fast food pizza places offer special deals if you collect your pizza in person and one of the most common deals is “any pizza, any size for £x.xx”. No doubt they assume that someone who’s ordering a pizza is a fat fuck, therefore it’s a rare occurrence for someone to actually make the effort to visit in person so it’s a minimal-loss sales technique.

Papa John’s offer this deal for £9.99 and although the price is the same as that for an identical offer with Domino’s, Papa John’s offer something which Domino’s doesn’t; a XXL size pizza. continue reading

Glucose Aid

Yesterday afternoon, I started to develop an annoying, dull headache. Knowing that I hadn’t consumed an awful lot of water during the day, I started to drink a lot of it as I was probably dehydrated.

Although the headache initially started to subside, it performed a full 180 degree turn and decided it was far from done where fucking my head with a pneumatic drill was concerned. continue reading

Royal Fail

Royal Fail

You’d think that after my recent experience with Wish, I would know better than to order items from China just to save a few quid. I have found to my own detriment that doing so costs more in time and in frustration, which far outweighs the initial monetary savings made.

Like a small child, someone with learning difficulties or a chimp, I need to make the same mistake several times before I eventually learn my lesson. continue reading

Spammy Spam Spam

For some bizarre reason, Ninja Hedgehog was inundated with spam comments today. Even more bizarrely, the URLs included as part of these comments (which I always remove anyway) seemed to be made up of random letters, although I’m not stupid enough to click on any of them before I remove them. I like to leave the comments and pretend they’re from the heart.

Ninja Hedgehog becomes neglected for longer and longer times because it’s difficult to find the time to get back in to writing my random crap again. Several months ago, I left my ‘safe’ job of almost a decade to embark upon a new chapter in my career choice. This is pretty intensive and will continue to be so for another year or so, so it’s even less likely that I’ll be able to update Ninja Hedgehog as often as I should. Rest assured, I have some ideas and I will be writing nonsense again soon!

New Car

Sadly, my insurance company didn’t think it was economical to repair my trusty Passat, so it’s been written off. I was incredibly fond of that car and had owned it for 3 years, so it was sad to find out that I wouldn’t be seeing it again (apart from here, where it’s currently being auctioned).

The insurance has paid out so I thought “fuck it, I’ll buy a new car”. I had gone to look at newer Passats but they just don’t exist with the spec my previous one had.

On my way out of the showroom, I happened to catch a glimpse of a Tiguan, which does have identical spec to my ex-Passat (with the added bonus of being an automatic and 4 wheel drive) so I’m now the owner of this.

The fuel economy is the same as my ex-Passat and I’ll have to sell my caravan, but the Tiguan smells nice, so it’s worth it.

Crash, Bang, Bollocks…

I managed to book a last minute Bank Holiday weekend caravan trip yesterday, which I’m quite looking forward to.

Unfortunately, on the way to work this morning, my car was hit by another car being driven by a woman in flip flops (who I’m fairly certain was on the phone at the time of the collision).

Now my weekend away is unlikely to happen and worse still, the insurance company have already hinted at my car being a write-off due to the age and the mileage of it. I’ve had this car for years; it’s comfortable, powerful and reliable and I recently bought new tyres and front brake discs.

Being pissed off is an understatement.

Anyway, here’s a photo of my poorly car…

Temporary Facebook Ban

I recently posted this photo on Facebook and Twitter, but it seems that some people take things a little too seriously.

I’ve been banned from Facebook for 24 hours (apparently, for security) after having to confirm that there were no images containing nudity on my personal Facebook account.

This was the only photo which contains nudity and I quickly saw that the offending post had kindly been removed on my behalf.

I understand that we all have our own definition of “offensive”, but we also have the ability to close the tab on our web browser.

You wouldn’t visit a porn site and then start reporting the videos because they contain sex, would you?

I’m going with the positive spin here, which is that Ninja Hedgehog offended Facebook. I can live with that.